Stopped following the default script of grades and safe jobs. Discovered individuation: the messy, self-directed work of figuring out what *you* actually want instead of what society pre-loaded.
The story
I chased the grade-ladder, neat little plan
They said, “Stay in your lane,” stick to the track
My brain felt like software shipped without tests
So I started refactoring, taking it back
🟢 Before: the default script
Good grades. Safe job. Climb the ladder. Try not to upset the system.
It is efficient, like mass-producing the same sweater in five million sizes.
Attila B. Horvath argues that traditional education often optimizes for society’s needs, not your *individual* potential, which is great if your life goal is compliance cosplay.
🟢 After: individuation, aka becoming less copy-paste
In *The Journey – What I Wished I Knew Before I Was 21*, Horvath centers *individuation*: a self-directed process of uncovering and integrating what you think, feel, and want, conscious and unconscious, so your uniqueness stops getting smothered by “normal.”
Nobody can do that integration for you. Not your boss. Not your parents. Not a motivational guy yelling into a microphone.
🟢 The upgrade: unlearn, relearn, repeat
Horvath leans on Alvin Toffler’s line: “The illiterate of the future will not be the person who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn and relearn.”
That is a whole operating system, not a cute quote.
If you want a clean entry point, read Chapters 1 to 2. Notice what ideas you’ve been running on autopilot. Which fears are *life-preserving*, and which are just mental latency? What “success” are you chasing, money-only, or the deeper stuff too?
For more about Chapters 1-2 of Attila B. Horvath’s book, “The Journey – I wish I knew this before I was 21”, visit https://attilahorvath.net/the-journey.
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