Discover a simple 4-step method to stop anger from derailing your conversations. No therapy needed—just practical steps that work when emotions run high.
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Ever noticed how anger hijacks our best intentions? One minute you’re calm, the next you’re saying things you regret.
I developed Practical Empathy Practice [PEP] after watching thousands of conversations go off the rails because of anger. What makes it work is its simplicity – no abstract concepts, just clear steps anyone can use.
Here’s the four-step process:
1. Observe objectively: Instead of “You always interrupt me,” try “During our meeting, you spoke while I was mid-sentence three times.” This removes blame.
2. Name your actual feelings: Not “I feel disrespected” [that’s judgment], but “I feel frustrated.”
3. Identify what matters to you: Is it consideration? Efficiency? Understanding?
4. Make positive requests: Instead of “Stop being rude,” try “Would you be willing to let me finish before responding?”
The magic happens when you practice cognitive empathy – genuinely trying to understand the other person’s view. Defensiveness melts away on both sides.
The best part? PEP doesn’t require therapy or special training – just practice. And the reward is moving from anger to peace, one conversation at a time.
Want to learn more? Check out Chapter 8 of my book “A Practical EmPath: Rewire Your Mind.”
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