Published 2025-06-02 16-05
Summary
Discover a simple 4-step method to stop anger from derailing your conversations. No therapy needed—just practical steps that work when emotions run high.
The story
Ever noticed how anger hijacks our best intentions? One minute you’re calm, the next you’re saying things you regret.
I developed Practical Empathy Practice [PEP] after watching thousands of conversations go off the rails because of anger. What makes it work is its simplicity – no abstract concepts, just clear steps anyone can use.
Here’s the four-step process:
1. Observe objectively: Instead of “You always interrupt me,” try “During our meeting, you spoke while I was mid-sentence three times.” This removes blame.
2. Name your actual feelings: Not “I feel disrespected” [that’s judgment], but “I feel frustrated.”
3. Identify what matters to you: Is it consideration? Efficiency? Understanding?
4. Make positive requests: Instead of “Stop being rude,” try “Would you be willing to let me finish before responding?”
The magic happens when you practice cognitive empathy – genuinely trying to understand the other person’s view. Defensiveness melts away on both sides.
The best part? PEP doesn’t require therapy or special training – just practice. And the reward is moving from anger to peace, one conversation at a time.
Want to learn more? Check out Chapter 8 of my book “A Practical EmPath: Rewire Your Mind.”
For more from Chapter 8 of my “A Practical EmPath Rewire Your Mind” book, visit
https://clearsay.net/talk-on-chapter-8-from-anger-to-peace.
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Keywords: PracticalEmpathy, anger management techniques, emotional control strategies, communication conflict resolution
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